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Serious Fun? (The Heineken Regatta Story Part 2)

4/1/2014

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After those fateful words carelessly uttered 10 months ago, I secretly hoped that this would just go away, but what I had set in motion last May was like a runaway train which gained momentum as the date for this year’s Heineken Regatta approached. Patrice and Bert never lost steam and certainly made ‘Ma Bell’ and ‘Mme France Telecom’ wealthier with endless telephone conversations on strategy, wind, weather, currents, sails and of course, crew.  Yes, now that this was happening we needed a full crew.

Patrice managed to lure our good cruising friend Steve of Receta, a soft-spoken Canadian with many regattas under his belt, up from Trinidad for the event.   He also recruited our Rasta friend, Son, an experienced local sailor to join us along with Jean-Paul (JP) of Julina, a gentle Frenchman and dear cruising friend.  With Bert’s wife, Judith, a sweet little lady with a great sense of humor and myself, the 7 member team was complete and the day Patrice officially signed Taka Trois up for the race, the grin on his face rivaled that of a kid on Christmas morning.

The countdown begins...

10 days before the race:  We begin seeing some serious looking boats with serious looking sails and very serious looking crew practicing their maneuvers around St. Martin.  The fact that the race is billed as Serious Fun doesn’t help my anxiety much.  I suspect that my definition of ‘fun‘ is not exactly the same as that of the people who run this thing or who participate in it.  
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One week before: Taka Trois is assessed and measured for her racing handicap by a professional, errr... measurer? I neglect to ask what his official title is.   My anxiety level improves when he assures me that based on what he has seen, we would be put in a group of fairly relaxed, non-professionals like us with only 10-20 boats or so in our class--very reassuring as I have been imagining a racing start with all 200+ entrants jockeying for position--a nightmare!   I just pray he’s right...

6 days before:  Bert and Judith arrive and the excitement aboard Taka Trois is palpable.  Patrice and Bert are like two boys with a huge toy, Taka Trois that is.  Thank heavens I have Judith to talk to, who is as clueless about racing strategy as I am.  
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Even when taking a break for a swim, Patrice and Bert relentlessly discuss the race.
Steve calls to say that he has found a ringer for us; a cruising buddy named George of Wildcat, a highly skilled racer from Texas who got bumped off another boat.  Their loss, our gain, although Steve later warns me that this guy is nuts.  I’m afraid to ask what that means... In any case, as it turns out, we really need him as sadly, Son is forced to desist shortly afterwards due to work obligations.
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Steve and Ann arriving in St. Martin on Receta
5 days before :  Receta arrives bringing us Steve and his wife Ann, and we hold our first race conference aboard Taka Trois, a pre-race celebration of sorts with champagne and foie gras. Hey, if I’m going to do this thing, I’m going to do it in style!  

Nevertheless, we have salient issues to discuss and I have put forward my two ‘requests:’  One, there will be no unnecessary shouting and two, if I, or anyone else for that matter, should fall overboard, racing will immediately stop and the person rescued.  This may seem like a no-brainer, but I have had my doubts since hearing the story of a woman in Grenada who fell off a boat during a race and had to wait in the water until the boat wend ahead to clear the racing mark, before coming back to pick her up!  As the Trinnys say, Nah!  That's NOT going to happen, right guys?

We also begin discussing the roles and responsibilities of the crew.  It is agreed that Patrice will remain skipper in name, but is happy to act as crew and leave the racing strategy to Steve who will be the tactician.  Bert will be helmsman (the guy who steers the boat), J.P. will be the maintrimmer (trimming the main sail), George and Patrice will alternate between grinding the winches to manage the headsail, trimming the headsail and being bowman (being at the front of the boat to make sure sails and stuff do what they’re supposed to do up there). 

As for Judith and I, we will simply do as we’re told and make sandwiches--I know, I know, this sounds like a cop-out for womankind, but believe me, we’re really happy to be lowly crew members without much responsibility.  As a wise Trinny once told me, there are times in life when one gets to be a shepherd and times when one has to be a sheep.  
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Baaaa....
In the end, Judith and I do have active roles during the race including grinding winches (pulling on ropes wound around a winch--kind of like a giant spool--to tighten up a sail), tailing (helping someone who is grinding by pulling on the rope from behind), releasing ropes from winches, keeping an eye out for other boats and sitting on the rail to add weight to the side of the boat (no comments please).  

At the last minute, I am also given the daunting responsibility of counting down the minutes before the shotgun start.  This job involves running two i-phone timers simultaneously (one for back up), while listening intently to the VHF where at any time the race officials can and will delay the start of the race sending me into a frenzy as I re-set the timers.  It's stressful job, but provides the blessing of distracting me from all the boats that are sailing uncomfortably close to us as we all try to get the into the best position before the shot rings out.
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Boats jockey for position at before the start of the race

Presenting Team Taka....

4 days before:  The girls go shopping for provisions while the boys go out for a first test sail and play with all the toys, I mean sails and boat stuff.  The major philosophical question of the day is whether to use Fred or not to use Fred.  ‘Fred’ is an enormous, expensive, extremely fragile spinnaker-type sail called a ‘Code 5’.  The rub is that if we declare it and use it, our handicap will be severely punished, so it had better be worth our while if we do use it and we had better know what we’re doing with it.  At the end of the day, the jury is still out.
3 days before:  As the boys need to spend another day getting Taka Trois in race mode and the girls once again leave them to their machinations and go for a hike. Still no verdict on Fred, but the calculators have appeared and the engineers, Bert and Patrice have steam coming out their ears.

2 days before:  Tomorrow we will leave the marina in Anse Marcel, our home in the north of the island and take Taka Trois down to anchor in Simpson Bay where the race will begin.  We finish provisioning the boat, make last minute equipment checks and take a drive down to race headquarters at the Yacht Club in Simpson Bay to check out the action, size up our competition over an ice-cold Heineken, pay our fee, collect our race number and get our bag of goodies.  We also need to inform the committee that after endless discussion, many calculations and much agonizing, we will be not be using Fred. 
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1 day before:  George, the much-lauded Texan arrives onboard and promptly shows his colors by dubbing the boat ‘Taco Tres!’  Quirky sense of humor aside, he quickly wins my heart with his sweet-tempered nature and obvious skill.

By mid-morning the entire crew is assembled aboard and ready to for a trial run while moving Taka Trois into position in Simpson Bay.  There will be 4 races over 3 days including one all the way around the island and more importantly 3 parties every evening where copious quantities of rum will be distributed to soothe bruised body parts and egos.

Our ‘dress rehearsal’ goes very well, with not a single cross word, I’m pleased to report and by the end of it, we’re beginning to look, at least from my inexperienced perspective, less like bumbling clowns (I speak soley about myself here and) more like a cohesive racing crew.  We drop anchor in Simpson Bay for the night and hit the sack early.

And away we go!

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Photo courtesy of Tim Wright/Photoaction. One of the cool things about entering a race of this type is there is usually a professional photographer taking photos during the race and at the end, you get to see a rare photo of your boat in action. To see more photos of us during the race, go to https://www.photoaction.com, click on Heineken Regatta 2104, scroll down the list of boats until you get to Taka Trois and voila! There we are!
If some of you have been holding your breath in suspense throughout this long-winded (pun intended) lead-up to the actual race, let me ease your mind right now.  We not only completed all four races of the regatta successfully and without incident, but for a first effort, we finished respectfully well, coming in 6th out of 17.  The competition was made up of largely boats like ourselves, with a half a dozen pro-boats sporting all the bells and whistles and fancy schmancy sails.  We were pleased that we successfully beat all our real competition (the non-pros) even without Fred.

More importantly, while we gave it a serious effort, we did indeed have fun.  Patrice will tell you that crossing the finish line on the last day (Bert insisted he take back the helm during the last leg) was one of the highlights of his life.   Although I could've done without those heart-stopping moments just before the start of the regatta where dozens of boats careened within inches around our precious baby boat while trying to get into perfect position for the shot-gun start, I really enjoyed seeing Taka Trois being put through her paces.  It was thrilling to take part in such an exciting event and to be a member of an exceptional team.  Serious, yes, but worth it and lots and lots of fun indeed!   
PS  Look out!  We'll be back next year....with Fred.  
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    Debbie is first mate of Taka Trois as well as head cook and chief provisioning officer. 


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